


Gunshots

by orphan_account



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Afterlife, Character Death, Death, M/M, Shooting, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-20
Updated: 2013-06-20
Packaged: 2017-12-15 15:05:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/850914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gunshots were not a good thing (not unless they were the quiet crack of Sebastian's rifle). They were not a good thing and neither Moran was prepared for this. Well. Yes, they were but they made a mistake. Everyone does that sometimes. Their mistake was a very, very big one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gunshots

Gunshots were not a good thing (not unless they were the quiet crack of Sebastian's rifle). They were not a good thing and neither Moran was prepared for this. Well. Yes, they were but they made a mistake. Everyone does that sometimes. Their mistake was a very, very big one.

Severin fell first, in the backstreet of a New York suburb. Somewhere filthy and dirty, somewhere he was not surprised to die. Even when he was a kid he knew his death wouldn't be spectacular.

Sebastian fell next, his hand on his gun, barely able to register the shock of watching red erupt on Severin's forehead, right in between his eyes. It was a shot he would have made. Sebastian wasn't startled either, to be dying in and alleyway like this. He was surprised, actually, that he hadn't died like this sooner.

Sebastian couldn't see the stars above them not because he couldn't see, but because there were no stars. Jim would hate it here. He hates it in London, too, but he can't leave. Sebastian knows, he's tried to make Jim go but it's like he's part of the city, breathing in a different sort of air is like being put into a gas tank.

And Sebastian's thoughts spiral on and on and on as he waits for something to happen. There isn't any light to be sucked into, no voice calling him into somewhere else. Just the thoughts.

Severin touches his shoulder and he doesn't question that he can still feel. He sits up and looks around. He doesn't see his body but he sees Severin's and he wonders if Severin is having the same experience.

"I fucking knew we'd die horny," Severin says but his voice is weak and sad. "Could still shag if you want."

"Not in the mood," Sebastian says and forcing the words out is like trying to swallow a live snake. He feels sad and weak. He thinks of the months after the army, when Severin still hated him and the days were laced with alcohol and he had a girlfriend but he could never seem to remember her name.

Jim couldn't save him this time. There wasn't a back alley to drag him out of, into the light, into a life. Jim couldn't do anything now.

"Me neither," Severin admits quietly.

"Why are we still here?" Sebastian wonders. He stands. Severin follows. They begin to walk.

"To say goodbye. Cant you' feel that?"

"Yeah. I just didn't want to accept that. Don't think I can see Jim."

"Richard's already thought I was dead once. He nearly killed himself."

They both go very quiet and continue to walk. They do not speak for a very long time after that. They walk for days, in between fence posts and over pavements that are familiar to them, from a past life, maybe, and they arrive in London at nightfall. It is the same day and they know time will be different from now on.

"We were gonna move out, you know," Severin says. They find a park and they sit on the grass, wet from a sprinkler.

"We were gong to rule the fucking world," Sebastian replies.

"Get away from Jim. He wanted to open a bakery."

"He wanted to be a god."

Severin is crying now. He's trying to hide it but then he takes his hand from his face and decides not to. Things are different now.

"Do you know where we are?" Severin asks after minutes of quiet crying. "We need to find them."

"I don't want to," Sebastian spits back.

"Why?" Severin asks and Sebastian has just said the most impossible thing to him. "You love Jim, right? I mean. I know you fucking hate goodbyes but he's your bloody boyfriend and you'd probably be fucking _married_ by now if Jim wasn't such a freak."

Sebastian stands. Swallows. He knows he can't leave Severin. That would ruin everything. They'd never leave if Sebastian abandons his brother. Sebastian knows where they are, he and Jim had fucked in this park once. He can't remember why but it had been a good idea at the time.

"Come on, then," Sebastian says and he feels like crying too. He doesn't cry. He hasn’t cried for years (he has though, in subspace but they never talked about that and it doesn't fucking count).

Severin stands and they walk. They get inside the building somehow and go up. There is screaming and they know that their twins know that they are dead. The door opens for them and they walk into the living room. It feels worse than dying had. Severin is crying again, silent tears. They know their twins cannot see them.

"You're lying!" Richard is screaming, shaking his head, his face is wet and his voice is hoarse. "Stop lying to me!" Sebastian knows he believes it, he's just clinging on to some hope, something.

"Richard," Jim just says and he looks as sad and as broken as his brother. This is what he looks like when he wakes up from nightmares, the ones that make him scream and shake, the ones that make him not sleep for a week after that, too scared to go back into the darkness. "Bunny. Calm down. P-please, I love you. You still have me."

"No!" Richard screams again and throws a pillow at Jim. Richard turns and stomps off into his bedroom, the one Severin wasn't supposed to sleep in but did anyway. Severin stays and Sebastian sits next to Jim, who's face is in his hands.

"I didn't say it enough but I really love you," Sebastian says. Jim looks up and it seems that for a moment he an see Sebastian but the tears fall harder down his face and he shakes his head and walks across the flat to his room and locks the door. Sebastian doesn't want to move. He could see the hurt building in Jim's room, falling off him like sweat and dripping onto the ground in black, wet puddles. It's going to drown Jim soon. Sebastian hopes it drains away before that.

Severin tugs on Sebastian's hand and the touch barely registers. They're fading. They have to say goodbye to Richard before they're gone.

They walk into his room and Severin has stopped crying. Sebastian feels like there's a weight in his chest. He didn't know dying would be as hard on himself as it would be for anyone else who cared.

Richard is laying in bed, the bottle of sleeping pills he kept, just in case, in his hand. Severin sits on the bed. Richard sees him and sobs quietly. They don't say anything, Severin just takes the bottle of pills and tucks them away in the dresser again and kisses Richard's forehead.

"I'm sorry," he says against the skin. "I love you."

"Don't leave," Richard begs in a voice that's too quiet, too breathless, too hurt. "Please. Please, I can't do it without you."

"I'm sorry," Severin says again and the twins leave the room. Severin is crying again and Sebastian thinks he might be too. They cannot see what is outside of the flat anymore.

"Do you think we're going to hell?" Severin asks.

"Don't think so," Sebastian say. They're stalling. Hesitating but things are getting more distant. "Don't think there is one. There's just… After."

Severin takes Sebastian's hand in his and he looks like a child and then so very, very old. Like maybe they had lived until the end after all and maybe it hadn't stopped too early.

The Moran twins step through the door, away from the heartbeat on Earth and into something different.

**Author's Note:**

> This makes no sense and probably just hurts and is mostly some thoughts I have and just yeah okay. Critique and review would be very, very helpful to me


End file.
